Ever find yourself wondering 'how did I become the parent in this relationship?" 

You always thought things will be easier with your mom or dad once you're grown; that they'll finally start seeing you as the adult you are.  But, that never happened.  The frustration that comes with years of unhealthy patterns: 

• being shut out for not meeting their needs

• never taking accountability for their actions

• the big emotional reactions when you try to share how you are feeling

• the leaning on you for their emotional needs

• the guilt for saying 'no' or trying to have your own life

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Or maybe its the inverse, you find yourself wondering, when will I have the relationship I want with my (adult) kid?  What did I do wrong for them to treat me like this? 

All you've ever wanted for your child is for them to be happy, to live the life they want, and to be a part of it! But now you find they shut you out, wondering 'where did I go wrong, what did I say?' Or maybe they still rush to you, needing you to put their fires out and rescue them when they're overwhelmed and don't know what to do, and you are left picking up the pieces.   You find that:

• you're walking on eggshells around them

• always giving and its never enough or never the 'right' thing

• second-guessing yourself if you're the cause of their suffering

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Whether you are the child or the parent in the relationship, we are talking about boundaries, and how to be in relationship with a person we care deeply about, when there is an unhealthy dynamic at play.  We learn 'to care without carrying', we learn to 'love the person' and not the behavior, and how to be okay when they are not.  We learn that we can still live our life and accept they will make their own decisions regardless.  And I am here to help.  

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You can learn to love them AND feel good about your decisions, regardless

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This isn't where your story ends. It's where it begings.  Together we will help you create ways to build a healthy relational pattern, one that honors and respects your choices and boundaries, while also communicating your needs for closeness.  In therapy, we'll address shifting away from reactive patterns, building healthy connection, healing past wounds while learning new ways to relate. 

 

Healing is possible, and it starts with you.